Tag Archives: skills

5 Symptoms of a Money/Life Drain

Can we have more money without more problems? Money is just another form of energy. The true value of money is not based on how much we have, but rather how well it supports our life purpose and values. If money were not an issue, what would you do with your time? These are the truly valuable parts of life and the presence (or absence) of money influences the extent to which we are able to enjoy these priorities. Since our money is intimately linked to other ares of our life, a money drain is also a drain of our life energy. Below are five symptoms of people experiencing a money/life drain.

There are five symptoms of money/life drain.

1. Financial burdens, debt, out of control expenses. Whether on a household, local, or national level, debt has become an American staple and many of us are crippling under the weight of our debt burden. Debt implies that we are spending money that we do not have and requires that we pay for that “privilege”. While it can be reasonable to go into debt for things that will increase in value or increase our income potential (housing, education), carrying a large debt or going into debt for things that do not appreciate undermines our financial security both now and in the future.

2. Inability to save and pressure to earn/work more. For many Americans, the immediate response to the earlier problem of debt and financial problems is to work more and make more money. Imagine that there is a hole in the bottom of a cup. You want to drink a cool glass of lemonade but as you fill the glass, the lemonade continues to pour from the bottom. Adding more lemonade to the glass without filling the leak is not going to quench your thirst. Likewise, until you address the leak in your financial system, adding more money will not relive your financial burden. As my financial coach Lynn Richardson always says “more money does NOT solve a money problem…if it did millionaires would not go broke.” Although working longer hours to earn more does not solve our financial problems, it does help to exacerbate the next symptom of money/life drain.

3. Stressed relationships. There are studies that suggest as much as 90% of all divorces are connected to conflicts about money. Again conflicts about money cut across all income levels. However, the attempt to solve money problems by working more exacerbates the strain on relationships because people have less time to spend with family and friends.

4. Increased stress and decreased health. Stress is both an emotional and a physical condition. The stress and worry that accompanies financial burdens decreases our sense of security and self-esteem. It can also produce headaches, frequent infections, muscular twitches, fatigue, skin irritations, breathlessness as well as host of chronic illnesses.

5. Financial/emotional/and spiritual depletion. Even those individuals who have accumulated all the most treasured “toys” may be haunted by the question “is this all there is?” Like energy, money is intended FOR a purpose, it is not the end value. The pursuit of money for itself can lead to a spiritual crisis both for those who get lots of it and for those who never reach their financial goals. A person’s value cannot be measured by their net worth or credit score.

More money doesn't solve a money problem.

Are you experiencing any of the symptoms of the money/life drain? If more money is not the solution to this chronic illness, then what is? Wisdom and choice are our key resources to correcting the money/life drain we are experiencing. Making wise financial choices implies making wise life choices and vice versa. This requires us to inspect every area of our lives to see how it feeds/or detracts from our life vision. True prosperity (more money without money problems) requires that we restructure our thoughts, words, and actions so that they align with our life purpose and reflect our values and priorities. We have described the symptoms of a money/life drain. The condition is deadly but the prognosis is good. You can have a complete and permanent recovery, but it requires that you take the medicine daily. Today choose life, choose health, choose abundance!


Take Your Leadership (and Your Life) to the Next Level

Seven years ago, I made my first trip to the beautiful country of Ghana in West Africa. My desire to visit this place was so great that I was willing to separate from my nine month old twins for two weeks. I wanted to bring my babies back something truly special from the trip that would communicate the unique beauty of this country. Kofi, a graduate student from the University of Ghana, was given the unfortunate responsibility of taking me shopping. We went from store to store loking at the beautiful batik  clothing, trying to find the perfect outfit for my babies. I was surprised and confused that none of the outfits had sizes in them. Every five minutes I would hold up a gorgeous children’s outfit to Kofi and ask him if he thought it would fit a nine-month old. Kofi patiently and consistantly gave me the same answer “children grow.” While I was too preoccupied with shopping to understand the wisdom of Kofi’s response at the time, I have since reflected on it many times over.

Too often in our lives we ar so focused on the “right” fit in the present, ignoring the reality that people grow and what fits us today probably will not tomorrow. So we may need to readjust our understanding of the “right” fit to include things that are currently bigger, knowing that we will grow into them. The confidence and commitment to our personal development allows us to maximize our leadership and enjoyment of life.

What kind of a leader are you growing into?

At work maximizing our leadership implies embracing situations where we are given new responsibilities that are beyond our current skill set and experience. Promotions often place people beyond their current ability and skill set. You may be an excellent sales person with with a great sales record but that skill set does not immediately qualify you as a great manager, eventhough it’s your sales record that earned you the promotion.  Some of us may refuse to accept such opportunities for fear of no longer being “successful” while others assume that the promotion infers that no changes are necessary and eventually crash and burn. Yet, we each can successfully grow into our next level of leadership by equipping ourselves with new skills, knowledge, and experiences. To succsessfuly meet the challenges of our new position, we must fully embrace the fact that learning is a life long process.

However, this process of growing into the next level of leadership does not only apply to our careers. Relationships, especially those involving new roles like marriage and parenting, also require us to grow into new levels of leadership. The success of these relationships depends upon our willingness to constistantly retool ourselves to meet the emerging responsibilities and opportunities. Although children are born, great parents are not. People become great parents by opening themselves to learn new skills and developing new qualities that will be more effective in parenting that child. Parenting (marriage, friendship,ect.)  is a relationship between two people in which each person is acting, observing, and remodulating based on the other.

Innovation is a critical skill for your life.

Innovation is not only required for auto-dealers and technology companies, but for each one of us. So if we desire to sucesfully fulfill the new opportunities life presents to us, then reflection and revision become life long practices. When we are open to learn and challenge ourselves to innovate, we will sucessfully grow into ever increasing levels of leadership. Thus, expanding our ability to make a positive difference in the world.

So as you reflect on your current form of leadership in your career, family, organization, and community, consider how well your clothes fit. If there fit perfectly, if you are totally comfortable, I would encourage you to shop for a “bigger size”  because there is room for your to grow and expand your influence in this world.