Tag Archives: disempowering behavior

You Are Just a Few Degrees Away from Your Dreams

Can we really accomplish the changes that we want to see in our lives?

To borrow a refrain from President Obama’s campaign “YES WE CAN!” Change is possible and you have everything you need to bring about the changes of your dreams. As Tony Robbins explains in the video above, the difference between your current life and changes you desire is often 1-2 millimeters. Here you will find some resources to help you make these small but necessary changes.

A critical step in implementing permanent change is understanding the function of disempowering behavior. Disempowering behavior refers to any actions that stand between you and the person you want to be. As you attempt to implement positive change in your life, what specific habits/ behaviors interfer with your progress? These are the disempowering behaviors that must be addressed. Too often we rely on sheer will power to overcome disempowering behaviors. Yet will power always fails. It may bring us temporary success, but will power alone will never produce permanent change.

Analyzing our disempowering behaviors is essiential for our success because our brain works according to something known as positive intent. Positive intent means that our brains desire to create a positive experience for us and when we have an unmet need our brains will focus on experiences in the past that have met that need (even if these behaviors are no longer appropriate). For example, if we are feeling unloved or un-noticed, we may rely on a habit of whining or complaining to meet our legitimate need for love and attention, eventhough such behavior may no longer be appropriate and may strain our relationships. The law of positive intent requires that we understand why we habitually turn to these disempowering behaviors before we can overcome them. Trust me, ALL disempowering behavior fulfills some need and you would not continue this action if it did not fill a need for you in some way.

There are five needs theorized to be universal to all humans. Use the list below and identify which needs are being fulfilled by your disempowering behaviors. If you need assistance with this activity, please enlist the help of a friend or send me an email. The five needs that all humans share are:

1. the need to feel safe and secure
2. the need to be loved and be noticed
3. the need to be important and competent
4. the need to be autonomous and free
5. the need to feel worthy

I want 2011 to be a great year for you and that requires dealing head on with disempowering behaviors. I am hosting a live chat on twitter (tweetchat.com #7steps) to present the next step in overcoming your disempowering behaviors. Please reflect on the needs filled by your disempowering behaviors and join me on twitter tomorrow, March 22nd at 8pm (EST) to continue your journey toward making permanent positive change. If you have friends, co-workers, or relatives who have also expressed frustration at the process of creating positive change, please share this blog post with them and invite them to join us on 3/22 for step three in the seven step process of making permanent change.